In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “A House Divided.”
The room is almost silent except for the sound of the wind against the windows, the weather doing it’s ever changing routine. The three of us sitting around in a semi-circle trying to make sense of the paperwork in front of me. Explanations of planning stages, various cost schedules, the way the process will play out on a calendar all represented. No one wants to be the first to speak, but sometimes you just have to jump in. No slowly lowering yourself into the pool pretending that it’s easier, less shocking to the system.
“The first thing we need to figure out is how this will effect other people. How will they react and what can we do to ensure that they aren’t put out.”
“Well, I figure if we tell people, or at least the right people first, the information will make it’s way around in some manner. It might not be the smartest move, but there is no simple answer. We’ve looked at the data available and people will have to make their own conclusions on what is best for them.”
“”I disagree. It has to stay between us for the short term. Information has been used in the past to extract an advantage, an unfair advantage. Since this isn’t a democracy, and I control the data, we’re going to just tell people there is an issue but it is being worked on. It will become a distraction for some, others will run away, while even more will just sit back and hope that things change. I’ve lived that before, it’s worse than anything.”
The papers are being rifled through, some clause, some paragraph that might show the ability to take this in another direction. Any other direction than the one that lays before us. But the considered opinions of several experts has said that there can be only two outcomes. One much more acceptable than the other, but still a long road to travel.
“We need to come up with a decision. If we go with the plans as laid out, everything needs to begin to line up tomorrow. There’s no waiting, no pushing this off for another day.”
“I’m not sure I want to do any of this. The process is arduous, the outcome questionable, and the amount of pain it inflicts is going to be suffered by a few, but especially by one in particular. Me!”
“That’s not the way to look at this. Giving up isn’t going to make things better, you already know that.”
“But this isn’t about giving up, it’s about giving other things priority, attempting to get a few things done I want before it all goes away.”
“You need to stop looking at it from that perspective. Things can always change, people can be wrong. Maybe we can find a different solution as long as we try this one right now!”
The nurse walks into the room and asks if I had signed the paperwork allowing them to administer some experimental drug to help with my kidney.
“No, I’m going to see how things go. I appreciate what people are trying to accomplish, but right now I need to accomplish something else. Get some things corrected, make plans for others.” These are more directed at my mother, but the nurse seems to understand that. I’ve been prone to saying odd things at times not knowing who was in the room and who was listening.
My mother walks out of the room, trying her best to control the mix of anger and hurt she is feeling. There are no good decisions. There is no clear path, go to the left and things work out. Go to the right and you don’t get a positive outcome.
Tomorrow morning i have to make some serious decisions and I’m not sure what to do.